Friday, June 14, 2013

Worries of a Kindergarten Mom: Will my kids have problems in school because they have two mommies?

As I've been trying to wrangle all of the necessary details for our upcoming move into some semblance of order it just occurred to me tonight that starting in August when C and R start school, kindergarten and preschool respectively, that I'm going to get to navigate the possibly tricky world of elementary school politics.  I've never done this before and while I'm excited my kids are starting school and will be making new friends I can't help but wonder how their new friends' parents and teachers will feel about me and L.  How many other families at my kids' school are going to have two-mom or two-dad families?  Are we going to be something strange to gawk at or are we going to be just another ordinary couple?

When asking my friends for school advice for the kids this question wasn't even a blip on my radar of all-important-things-to-ask.  Instead I asked about the teachers, and the curriculum, and if they can handle kids with attention and emotional issues like C's.  Never once did I think to ask about things like if the school was LGBT friendly, or if it had serious religious leanings.  I don't think of these things because to me our family is just like any other with small children.  I don't think of these things because religion doesn't play a big part in our daily lives.

But now I'm worried.

The "what ifs" are bombarding my brain (at 2am no less), demanding to be given thought better late than never.  What if our kids get teased for having two moms.  What if the other kids' parents won't let them play with C and R because their family is "different".  What if (heaven forbid!) the teachers discriminate against C and R because they don't like mine and L's "lifestyle".  What if because we aren't a good Christian family that the kids get left out of after school playdates with their classmates?  What if, what if, what if?  If I didn't already have a headache this train of thought would definitely give me one!

At this point there isn't a whole lot that can be done.  The kids' information has been submitted, they are both enrolled.  We got to pick our first and second choice schools for the kids to go to but aside from that the school district will actually decide for us and once the decision is made and we are informed of it in late July/early August it'll be too late to change where they go this year.  Best case scenario all of my what if worryings will be for naught and the school that the kids wind up in will be fantastic and open-minded, regardless of our family make-up or religious beliefs.  Worst case scenario...  I don't really wanna go there but we all know it'll be bad.

Only time will tell how this turns out but I know I've got my fingers crossed.  I just really hope that our family's first foray into the public school system isn't a total bust simply because our kids have two mommies.

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